Review: The Amazing Spider-man: Renew Your Vows (2016) #2
You know you've got an awesome family when the parents are able to fight a T-Rex.
Happy Valentines Day, everybody. Since this is the day of romance, I decided that today's review should feature my favorite couple in comic books, Peter Parker and Mary Jane. These two were married for around twenty years, becoming as iconic as Superman and Lois Lane. Then came One More Day and Spider-man was forced by the editors to give his marriage up to Mephisto. While I still wish they would undo that horrible comic, I'm glad we have something to give us more married stories today.
It's time to take another look at the series that got me to review comics, The Amazing Spider-man: Renew Your Vows. The comic that takes place in a world where Peter is still married to Mary Jane and has a daughter named Annie. The series centers around this new Spider-family's adventures since Annie has inherited her dad's powers and MJ now has a suit that lets her share his powers.
The last issue that I reviewed proved to be quite a success, being the sixth best-selling comic of the month. This is especially great when you consider the fact that none of the mainstream Spider-man comics were even in the Top Ten. So when the next issue came out, of course I bought it.
But before we get into this issue, I'd like to apologize for a mistake that I made while reviewing the last one. I said that Mary Jane was the new Spider-woman in this world and even made a joke about it. However, it turns out she's using an original spider-name in this series. Whoops.
But if she's not Spider-woman, then who is she? Is the name a good one? Well, let's find out by taking a look at what I like to call, The Spectacular Spider-family #2.
In the last issue, we saw that Peter Parker's life in this alternate universe is pretty much what it should be in the main one. The only questionable thing being why he still works at the Daily Bugle. But it's a minor complaint. We ended off as Spider-man and Mary Jane were about to take on a T-Rex, only to find out Annie had been captured by the Mole Man.
While the last cover was okay, this one is just awesome. We got Mary Jane in costume and in action against moloids while her husband and daughter are clearly in trouble in the background and the Mole Man is waving his staff around in anger. This is a way of letting us know who the book will be focusing on this time, Mary Jane herself. Like I said last time, Mary Jane's costume has really grown on me and it looks great here.
SPOILERS BELOW: scroll to the bottom if you haven't read the book.
We open... actually before the Mole Man and T-Rex. It seems each of the first three issues focuses on one of the Spider-family members daily lives before advancing the plot a little. I'm okay with this since it lets us get to know them individually before we see them working together.
Remember how Spidey was trying to remember groceries last issue? Well, it seems MJ is trying to remember names of people who will be coming to a party while also getting her daughter to school the fastest way possible: web-swinging.
Apparently, Annie did her school project last minute and, being a good mother, Mary Jane is getting on to her for it.
MJ: You should have finished your poster last night.
ANNIE: Coulda. Woulda. Shoulda.
MJ: Annie May Parker!
Hey! Secret identities. Remember? Still, anyone who's had a childhood knows you're in trouble when your parents call you by your full name. They land in an alley where Annie unmasks and apologizes, looking pretty sad that her mom yelled at her. It's here that we have a brief, but nice moment with MJ.
ANNIE: Sorry I made you mad.
MJ: Hey. Apology accepted. And don't ever be afraid to make me or your dad mad.
Now if your dad were the Hulk, that'd be a completely different story. But this is actually an interesting moment for Mary Jane. I didn't think too much on it when reading this issue for the first time, but I saw a post on Tumblr that provided scans like this.
Yeah. For those of you who don't know, Mary Jane had an abusive childhood. Whether or not this scene between her and Annie was intentionally referencing MJ's past, it's still a nice touch.
After sending Annie to take the rest of the way to school on her scooter, Mary Jane swings off and we get some more narration from her about how hard it is to balance her life as a store owner/parent/blogger/party planner/wife. Once again, proving my belief that she and Peter are perfect for each other. Of course I'm kidding about that being the proof. This is actually part of what makes her character relatable in the comic. Having to juggle so many responsibilities is a big part of life as an adult.
With the typical Parker luck, Mary Jane's trip through town in interrupted when she sees a police chase. Being the heroine that she is, she swings into action. The crooks escape the police cars by taking a smaller path in the park, thinking they got away.
The thugs are stopped and their bike is sent crashing into a river. All the civilians in the park immediately do the first thing you should always do when you see two criminals or motorcycle crash: pull out their cell phones to take pictures.
MJ does the wise thing and gets out of there before they can get any shots of her. Seriously, with a mask like hers, you're not going to want anyone to take pictures and risk anyone figuring out your identity from studying it.
And so, once again, the day is saved. Thanks to... Um... What's her heroine name again?
We then cut to the next scene in Soho, NYC; where we see Mary Jane's current occupation as a clothing store owner. The name of her store? MJ's. Wonder how long it took her to come up with that. But there seems to be a real problem. Her employee made a mistake while ordering stock. When MJ told him to order 50 sweaters, he ordered 50 hundred. To top it off, their rent for the building has been raised.
MJ: How could this day get any worse?
MJ, after being married to a superhero for so many years, you should know better than to ask that question.
Right on cue, there's a notification from her computer and her employee reads it for her, since she can't bring herself to look. However, we cut to when she visits a coffee shop and expresses the news. It turns out that her fashion blog has just won an award from a big fashion writer in New York. Meaning her blog is about to get a lot more views while her store gets a lot more customers.
Wow. That's got to be the first time I've ever seen something good come from asking that question. I wonder— No. Better not risk it.
Just as Mary Jane's about to get her coffee, however, she overhears the news on a nearby TV, learning about the situation we saw in last issue. You know, at the site where the battle with Regent was and where Spidey is fighting a mega-freaking T-Rex.
MJ rushes out and makes her way to a rooftop where she suits up. Her narration gives us a quick recap of how it uses Regent's tech to let her share her husband's powers and we learn that the spider on her back lights up. After that, the spider-powered MJ swings off and we still don't know her super-name.
When we arrive at the site of the battle, our attention is first turned to a policeman who's denying access to the site. Since, you know, there's a T-Rex and moloids running wild. But the current CEO of Oscorp steps out, letting the officer know he has the mayor himself currently on the line from his phone. The CEO is none other than Norman Osborn II, or Normie to long-time readers.
I noticed a lot of people thought it was Harry that we saw back in last issue. But it seemed pretty obvious to me that he was way too young, despite the low lighting, to be anyone else.
Back with MJ, we see as she dives into action and knocks away all the moloids that had been dog-piling on Spider-man and the comic uses a mirrored image of a panel from last issue.
The comic finally catches up to where we were before. Spider-man and Mary Jane are about to face a T-Rex when they realize the Mole Man has Annie. Now we get to the dialogue from our villain. Ooh boy, do we get his dialogue.
MOLE MAN: Check and mate, Spider-peoples! Touchdown, Home run, three-point throw at the buzzer, final soccer score 1–0 (and other sports metaphors, yes)!
That parenthesis isn't a joke. Every word written above is actual dialogue from the comic and there's more crazy, random stuff he says in the comic. I've heard a lot of people question why Mole Man is talking like this. They usually aren't that familiar with the character, so I decided to take a quick look at whatever dialogue I could find from the mainstream version. No. He doesn't normally talk crazier than the Joker.
However, this is more than made up for with what happens next. Gerry Conway stated in a recent interview that this issue has one of his favorite Mary Jane moments and I think this is it. Just as the Mole Man threatens to kill Annie, Mary Jane leaps down from above and tackles the moloids. It is brutal as she knocks all of them away. Some are even coughing up blood from her blows. It's all accompanied by her narrative text-blocks, saying she's not a worrier like Peter, but if you mess with her kid, she'll go momma-bear on you.
That, was freaking awesome! Not only is it an epic hero moment, it also reinforces why I believe Mary Jane would take on a heroine identity. She wants to be involved so she can protect her daughter. The added on bit where she grounds Annie feels like a mic drop. In which case, it was a bit early.
Because Spider-man swings in and pulls the two of them out of the way of the still rampaging T-Rex. We then get a whole page showing the Spider-family dodge the T-Rex's attacks and yet they're able to have a conversation throughout the whole thing. Spider-man want's Mary Jane to get Annie out, but MJ wants Annie to get out on her own while she helps him. It's so much fun seeing them as parents. Why on earth does Marvel Editorial still think this marriage would make the mainstream comics boring?
Oh, and if you thought Mary Jane saving Annie was epic, here's an image of Spider-man and Mary Jane double KO-ing a T-Rex in the head.
I'll ask again: why don't we get stuff like this in the mainstream comics? It's amazing!
Just as the dinosaur goes down, Annie lets her parents know that the Mole Man is getting away with Regent's tech. The Spider-family regroups on a wall, where Spidey tells Annie to go home. Um, Peter, she's supposed to be at school, remember? Annie whines, but quickly gives in when her mom joins the conversation.
SPIDEY: How do you do that?
MJ: You think your spider-powers are tough to beat? Mom power is on a whole other level.
And, cue Annie jumping down to get involved anyway. Great parenting, guys. But before they jump back into the fight, Spidey lets MJ know the reason why he wants her and Annie to get out (aside from being protective). Turns out, my suspicions from my last review of this series was right. Because Mary Jane's suit taps into his powers, it's weakening him. Plus, it seems to effect him the most when they're together. The reason he hasn't told her this before is he's not sure if it's a problem yet. But before the conversation can finish, the floor around them collapses and they tumble down a long hole.
Mary Jane wakes up lying on the ground while Spidey is chained up next to her and the Mole Man is sitting in his throne.
MOLE MAN: You and your webby partner will be the first to witness the beginning of a new era!
Not another new era! Marvel, that's got to be the tenth new era that's started in these comics in the past few years.
MOLE MAN: What was up will be down.
So, Dimension X from the TMNT cartoon on Nickelodeon. Oh no! Mole Man's actually a Kraang!
MOLE MAN: Chickens will sleep with lions, frogs will fly, crabs will eat whipped cream, and rats will chase dogs.
Seriously, what kind of drugs is the Mole Man on right now? The Joker would look at him and say "I thought I was crazy!"
This villain's dialogue is so random and weird, that I don't look forward to seeing more of him at all. Maybe this series should steer clear of some villains outside of Spidey's rogues gallery. The other option being that they work more with villains that they know how to handle correctly
But we finally have our moment of truth as the comic book ends with Mole Man asking what Mary Jane is. We finally learn the name of this newest Spider-hero.
There you have it, Everybody. Mary Jane's official superhero name: Spinneret... Well, I can think of a few worse names.
END SPOILERS
This was a pretty good comic. It's still not great, but it's good for setting up Mary Jane's character in this series. Once again, the real strength of the book is in it's characterization. Mary Jane still feels like the character I've come to love over the years, while also being a realistic mom. We also see some great moments that make her character relatable to adult readers.
My only big complaint about the book is Mole Man's dialogue. Holy crap, his dialogue is mind boggling. I've heard people complain about Mary Jane's superhero codename, but I think it has a bit of a ring to it. The story doesn't progress much, but that's because it's character focused. I also still feel the need to ask why Marvel still thinks this is less interesting than Peter being the CEO of his own company. This is the Spider-man fans have been begging for ever since they came out with One More Day.
The next issue of this series gives us a look at Annie's daily life and an interesting revelation about her powers. However, I think I've been deep in Marvel comics lately. So the next review will be a comic starring one of my favorite DC heroes: The Blue Beetle.
Happy Valentines Day, everybody. Since this is the day of romance, I decided that today's review should feature my favorite couple in comic books, Peter Parker and Mary Jane. These two were married for around twenty years, becoming as iconic as Superman and Lois Lane. Then came One More Day and Spider-man was forced by the editors to give his marriage up to Mephisto. While I still wish they would undo that horrible comic, I'm glad we have something to give us more married stories today.
It's time to take another look at the series that got me to review comics, The Amazing Spider-man: Renew Your Vows. The comic that takes place in a world where Peter is still married to Mary Jane and has a daughter named Annie. The series centers around this new Spider-family's adventures since Annie has inherited her dad's powers and MJ now has a suit that lets her share his powers.
The last issue that I reviewed proved to be quite a success, being the sixth best-selling comic of the month. This is especially great when you consider the fact that none of the mainstream Spider-man comics were even in the Top Ten. So when the next issue came out, of course I bought it.
But before we get into this issue, I'd like to apologize for a mistake that I made while reviewing the last one. I said that Mary Jane was the new Spider-woman in this world and even made a joke about it. However, it turns out she's using an original spider-name in this series. Whoops.
But if she's not Spider-woman, then who is she? Is the name a good one? Well, let's find out by taking a look at what I like to call, The Spectacular Spider-family #2.
In the last issue, we saw that Peter Parker's life in this alternate universe is pretty much what it should be in the main one. The only questionable thing being why he still works at the Daily Bugle. But it's a minor complaint. We ended off as Spider-man and Mary Jane were about to take on a T-Rex, only to find out Annie had been captured by the Mole Man.
While the last cover was okay, this one is just awesome. We got Mary Jane in costume and in action against moloids while her husband and daughter are clearly in trouble in the background and the Mole Man is waving his staff around in anger. This is a way of letting us know who the book will be focusing on this time, Mary Jane herself. Like I said last time, Mary Jane's costume has really grown on me and it looks great here.
SPOILERS BELOW: scroll to the bottom if you haven't read the book.
We open... actually before the Mole Man and T-Rex. It seems each of the first three issues focuses on one of the Spider-family members daily lives before advancing the plot a little. I'm okay with this since it lets us get to know them individually before we see them working together.
Remember how Spidey was trying to remember groceries last issue? Well, it seems MJ is trying to remember names of people who will be coming to a party while also getting her daughter to school the fastest way possible: web-swinging.
 |
| If this was how my parents took me to school, I might've looked forward to the trip. |
MJ: You should have finished your poster last night.
ANNIE: Coulda. Woulda. Shoulda.
MJ: Annie May Parker!
Hey! Secret identities. Remember? Still, anyone who's had a childhood knows you're in trouble when your parents call you by your full name. They land in an alley where Annie unmasks and apologizes, looking pretty sad that her mom yelled at her. It's here that we have a brief, but nice moment with MJ.
ANNIE: Sorry I made you mad.
MJ: Hey. Apology accepted. And don't ever be afraid to make me or your dad mad.
Now if your dad were the Hulk, that'd be a completely different story. But this is actually an interesting moment for Mary Jane. I didn't think too much on it when reading this issue for the first time, but I saw a post on Tumblr that provided scans like this.
Yeah. For those of you who don't know, Mary Jane had an abusive childhood. Whether or not this scene between her and Annie was intentionally referencing MJ's past, it's still a nice touch.
After sending Annie to take the rest of the way to school on her scooter, Mary Jane swings off and we get some more narration from her about how hard it is to balance her life as a store owner/parent/blogger/party planner/wife. Once again, proving my belief that she and Peter are perfect for each other. Of course I'm kidding about that being the proof. This is actually part of what makes her character relatable in the comic. Having to juggle so many responsibilities is a big part of life as an adult.
With the typical Parker luck, Mary Jane's trip through town in interrupted when she sees a police chase. Being the heroine that she is, she swings into action. The crooks escape the police cars by taking a smaller path in the park, thinking they got away.
 |
| Mary Jane, you forgot your mask again! |
MJ does the wise thing and gets out of there before they can get any shots of her. Seriously, with a mask like hers, you're not going to want anyone to take pictures and risk anyone figuring out your identity from studying it.
And so, once again, the day is saved. Thanks to... Um... What's her heroine name again?
We then cut to the next scene in Soho, NYC; where we see Mary Jane's current occupation as a clothing store owner. The name of her store? MJ's. Wonder how long it took her to come up with that. But there seems to be a real problem. Her employee made a mistake while ordering stock. When MJ told him to order 50 sweaters, he ordered 50 hundred. To top it off, their rent for the building has been raised.
MJ: How could this day get any worse?
MJ, after being married to a superhero for so many years, you should know better than to ask that question.
Right on cue, there's a notification from her computer and her employee reads it for her, since she can't bring herself to look. However, we cut to when she visits a coffee shop and expresses the news. It turns out that her fashion blog has just won an award from a big fashion writer in New York. Meaning her blog is about to get a lot more views while her store gets a lot more customers.
Wow. That's got to be the first time I've ever seen something good come from asking that question. I wonder— No. Better not risk it.
Just as Mary Jane's about to get her coffee, however, she overhears the news on a nearby TV, learning about the situation we saw in last issue. You know, at the site where the battle with Regent was and where Spidey is fighting a mega-freaking T-Rex.
MJ rushes out and makes her way to a rooftop where she suits up. Her narration gives us a quick recap of how it uses Regent's tech to let her share her husband's powers and we learn that the spider on her back lights up. After that, the spider-powered MJ swings off and we still don't know her super-name.
When we arrive at the site of the battle, our attention is first turned to a policeman who's denying access to the site. Since, you know, there's a T-Rex and moloids running wild. But the current CEO of Oscorp steps out, letting the officer know he has the mayor himself currently on the line from his phone. The CEO is none other than Norman Osborn II, or Normie to long-time readers.
I noticed a lot of people thought it was Harry that we saw back in last issue. But it seemed pretty obvious to me that he was way too young, despite the low lighting, to be anyone else.
Back with MJ, we see as she dives into action and knocks away all the moloids that had been dog-piling on Spider-man and the comic uses a mirrored image of a panel from last issue.
 |
| Deja Vu. |
MOLE MAN: Check and mate, Spider-peoples! Touchdown, Home run, three-point throw at the buzzer, final soccer score 1–0 (and other sports metaphors, yes)!
That parenthesis isn't a joke. Every word written above is actual dialogue from the comic and there's more crazy, random stuff he says in the comic. I've heard a lot of people question why Mole Man is talking like this. They usually aren't that familiar with the character, so I decided to take a quick look at whatever dialogue I could find from the mainstream version. No. He doesn't normally talk crazier than the Joker.
However, this is more than made up for with what happens next. Gerry Conway stated in a recent interview that this issue has one of his favorite Mary Jane moments and I think this is it. Just as the Mole Man threatens to kill Annie, Mary Jane leaps down from above and tackles the moloids. It is brutal as she knocks all of them away. Some are even coughing up blood from her blows. It's all accompanied by her narrative text-blocks, saying she's not a worrier like Peter, but if you mess with her kid, she'll go momma-bear on you.
 |
| Never... Ever... Mess with a mother's kid. |
Because Spider-man swings in and pulls the two of them out of the way of the still rampaging T-Rex. We then get a whole page showing the Spider-family dodge the T-Rex's attacks and yet they're able to have a conversation throughout the whole thing. Spider-man want's Mary Jane to get Annie out, but MJ wants Annie to get out on her own while she helps him. It's so much fun seeing them as parents. Why on earth does Marvel Editorial still think this marriage would make the mainstream comics boring?
Oh, and if you thought Mary Jane saving Annie was epic, here's an image of Spider-man and Mary Jane double KO-ing a T-Rex in the head.
Just as the dinosaur goes down, Annie lets her parents know that the Mole Man is getting away with Regent's tech. The Spider-family regroups on a wall, where Spidey tells Annie to go home. Um, Peter, she's supposed to be at school, remember? Annie whines, but quickly gives in when her mom joins the conversation.
SPIDEY: How do you do that?
MJ: You think your spider-powers are tough to beat? Mom power is on a whole other level.
And, cue Annie jumping down to get involved anyway. Great parenting, guys. But before they jump back into the fight, Spidey lets MJ know the reason why he wants her and Annie to get out (aside from being protective). Turns out, my suspicions from my last review of this series was right. Because Mary Jane's suit taps into his powers, it's weakening him. Plus, it seems to effect him the most when they're together. The reason he hasn't told her this before is he's not sure if it's a problem yet. But before the conversation can finish, the floor around them collapses and they tumble down a long hole.
 |
| I knew it was a bad idea to follow that white rabbit. |
MOLE MAN: You and your webby partner will be the first to witness the beginning of a new era!
Not another new era! Marvel, that's got to be the tenth new era that's started in these comics in the past few years.
MOLE MAN: What was up will be down.
So, Dimension X from the TMNT cartoon on Nickelodeon. Oh no! Mole Man's actually a Kraang!
MOLE MAN: Chickens will sleep with lions, frogs will fly, crabs will eat whipped cream, and rats will chase dogs.
Seriously, what kind of drugs is the Mole Man on right now? The Joker would look at him and say "I thought I was crazy!"
This villain's dialogue is so random and weird, that I don't look forward to seeing more of him at all. Maybe this series should steer clear of some villains outside of Spidey's rogues gallery. The other option being that they work more with villains that they know how to handle correctly
But we finally have our moment of truth as the comic book ends with Mole Man asking what Mary Jane is. We finally learn the name of this newest Spider-hero.
 |
| Mole Man. You're a Dead Man. |
END SPOILERS
This was a pretty good comic. It's still not great, but it's good for setting up Mary Jane's character in this series. Once again, the real strength of the book is in it's characterization. Mary Jane still feels like the character I've come to love over the years, while also being a realistic mom. We also see some great moments that make her character relatable to adult readers.
My only big complaint about the book is Mole Man's dialogue. Holy crap, his dialogue is mind boggling. I've heard people complain about Mary Jane's superhero codename, but I think it has a bit of a ring to it. The story doesn't progress much, but that's because it's character focused. I also still feel the need to ask why Marvel still thinks this is less interesting than Peter being the CEO of his own company. This is the Spider-man fans have been begging for ever since they came out with One More Day.
The next issue of this series gives us a look at Annie's daily life and an interesting revelation about her powers. However, I think I've been deep in Marvel comics lately. So the next review will be a comic starring one of my favorite DC heroes: The Blue Beetle.
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